Parents, What Do You value?
Children are Your God-given Heritage
“For My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways My ways, says the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and My thoughts than your thoughts. (Isaiah 55:8-9).
Our culture has reduced child-rearing to a self-centered pursuit of the fulfillment for the parent. This is the world’s natural desire, but it is wrong. It is important to realize that children are given to us by God, and He has a purpose and a plan for our children.
One thing that is huge in the world’s mindset towards children is control; it wants to control how many children to have, when to have them and everything about raising them according to its values. However, God did not create marriage so that you could have your expectations satisfied by your own planning and goal-setting.
The spiritual reality is that God has given children as a blessing. Recognize children as God’s gift to you. Purpose that they will be raised to love, know and honor God. Enlarge your tents! as you learn to embrace God’s plan for you as a whole (Isaiah 54:2). This is your inheritance, your reward! In the Hebrew, ‘reward’ refers to a promissory note given for a future payment of a just wage. Children are God’s promissory note of our eternal inheritance. If children are a blessing, how do they affect you? In your day-to-day life, children wonderfully encourage you to look toward eternity! Children bring happy expectations that color everything you do. If you live with a mindset that children are a drain, you will be discouraged and frustrated by that which was designed to bless you!
What’s Your Outlook?
Outlook affects how you approach everyday life. When you value children, the choices you make will reflect that value: you will cling to, treasure, revere, protect, and preserve the treasures that God has given to you! When you have a difficult day, having the right attitude will remind you that God’s purpose is bringing righteousness into your life and your home. It will remind you of God’s priority for your children.
Your goal for your children is not for them to become ideal members of society, but eternal members of God’s family! Having that eternal perspective will change the way you train your children.
One beautiful thing about the family is that God designed it to work toward His general objective of bringing a godly seed into the earth. The frustrations that a family experiences are God’s big and small tools that continually refine the rough edges of self-centered living. You cannot have a harmonious home without becoming less selfish. Remember, there is something of God’s very nature in your marriage; marriage speaks of Christ and the Church.
Marriage and family issues push you to your limits. When you are at your limits, preach the Gospel to yourself and remember God’s wonderful design for the family. Keep the Gospel simple and understandable in your family setting. Many a stranger may hear the Gospel through your family’s testimony. Be seasoned with salt and make the most of God’s greater purpose in your family: raise up a godly seed for generations to come!
Gospel Goals in Your Home
Belonging to your Heavenly Father is the primary relationship of your home. The Biblical family setting is in happy harmony with the Gospel. Biblical family goals are Gospel goals. However, the Gospel is more important than family because it is the restoration of the father-son relationship to all mankind. What the family reflects more than anything is the heavenly relationship that God desires to have with man. When we are saved by the grace of God, what cry does the Holy Spirit plant in your heart but the thriving, earnest declaration: “Abba Father” (Romans 8:15). In Christ you have a relationship with God as your heavenly father. Therefore, belonging to ‘Father’ is the primary relationship of your home.
Roles
God the Father’s image requires that both the masculine and the feminine roles be expressed fully in the home to represent Him. Perhaps you are wondering about the masculine connotation of ‘father’, where does ‘mother’ fit in? When the Bible speaks of earthly fathers, it is the male or masculine role being referred to in principle. However, ‘father’ incorporates both parents operating as one unit because together they reflect the fullness of Heavenly Father. God made man in His own image, but He created them male and female (Genesis 1:27). Together, the man and the woman combine to reflect God’s image. Within family, the fatherhood of God is expressed in the singular unit of the parents--two have become one. Husband and wife are one flesh. That oneness is expressed with masculinity in the husband/father role and with femininity in the wife/mother role. It is vital to understand that the fullness of God’s image requires that both the masculine and the feminine roles be expressed respectively in the parents, so that the parents in combined roles equal “Father” as they represent the image of God.
The Gospel transformation that adopts fallen mankind as the children of God is the guiding light for earthly family training. Every family situation must be seen in context to the Gospel. What the Gospel says speaks to every family relationship. You cannot find a family problem that does not have a simple Gospel solution. This harmony will govern and direct your parenting together in different roles and reflect the Gospel in the practical plans and decisions of the home. God designed the family for His glory and for our comfort as His children.
Align Your Values with God’s
As a redeemed family, you will value what Satan mocks! This world is a stage of competition of values. From where do your values come? You are called to value things that the world does not value because they are so ordinary. The ordinary is despised by the world. Your best defense against Satan is to highly Treasure God’s design for your family! The plainest parts of life are lovingly and sacrificially embraced at home. The world may see such things as unimportant and having little value. Remember to ask: ‘What does God value? What does God despise?” The Word tells us that God values the faith of those who see His hand and His person in their circumstances; those who value Him by faith and not by sight. Choosing values is a central challenge to the whole process of educating and training your child. Which path will you follow?
This article is taken in part from a book written by Gary called Taught of God: Treasuring God’s Design for the Family. Copies are available for purchase through the WCFS office.